I beat Chuck Norris !!When I came in tonight I had a message on my machine.
It was Chuck Norris. Yes the
Chuck Norris aka
Walker Texas Ranger.
Maybe you got one too. It was a recording inviting me to attend a political rally in Clemson. Still it's not every day you hear from a legend.
The call reminded me of one of my claim to fame stories. Honest, it is completely true.
I beat Chuck Norris !!
Ok it was a long time ago. As you know I went to high school in Southern California and we were on a band trip to a little tourist place called
Japanese Village and Deer Park. It's a cute little replica of a village complete with petting zoo.
In those days
Chuck Norris was yet to become the mega Hollywood star and still ran a string of Karate schools. He also was a semi-regular at the place giving demonstrations.
Our gang of musically inclined school kids, the
MVHS marching band, was there and Chuck made the mistake of asking for a volunteer. I got shoved into being it by my trouble making fellow drum section buddies.
He was at the part where he shows how he disarms a robber. He then gives me a wooden cutout that looked roughly like a semi-auto pistol. My instructions were to hold it out pointed at his back and say " stick 'em up". Chuck was then going to take the gun from my hand before I could even blink. He did not know I was well motivated and trying to impress a certain cute flute player.
So I pointed the gun and prepared to say my line. In theory Chuck Norris was going to... with a swift spinning turn and kick, knock the gun away then follow-up by grabbing me and taking control. I was supposed to say
"BANG" when I saw him move. But by then he said it would be too late as I would no longer have the gun.
I uttered my line ...."
stick 'em up", and the six time world champion quickly spun around in a blur and hit my wrist with his foot.
But I held on to the gun by some quirk of fate. As the room settled and Chuck stopped moving I said in a loud slow voice
" B A N G "The room fell apart and even Chuck had to laugh. He then went on to explain that was why you should
"NEVER try this yourself".So I had beaten the best. A man who was 65-6 life time. Arguably the best in the world.
I had beaten CHUCK NORRIS. ( did I make him 65 -7 ?)
BTW , Chuck is an outspoken Christan and has written several great books. Such as "
The Justice Riders", "
Against All Odds" and "The Secret of Inner Strength".
You should read one sometime.
And yes. If the roads are ok I will be at the rally.