I beat Chuck Norris !!
When I came in tonight I had a message on my machine. It was Chuck Norris. Yes the Chuck Norris aka Walker Texas Ranger.
Maybe you got one too. It was a recording inviting me to attend a political rally in Clemson. Still it's not every day you hear from a legend.
The call reminded me of one of my claim to fame stories. Honest, it is completely true.
I beat Chuck Norris !!
Ok it was a long time ago. As you know I went to high school in Southern California and we were on a band trip to a little tourist place called Japanese Village and Deer Park. It's a cute little replica of a village complete with petting zoo.
In those days Chuck Norris was yet to become the mega Hollywood star and still ran a string of Karate schools. He also was a semi-regular at the place giving demonstrations.
Our gang of musically inclined school kids, the MVHS marching band, was there and Chuck made the mistake of asking for a volunteer. I got shoved into being it by my trouble making fellow drum section buddies.He was at the part where he shows how he disarms a robber. He then gives me a wooden cutout that looked roughly like a semi-auto pistol. My instructions were to hold it out pointed at his back and say " stick 'em up". Chuck was then going to take the gun from my hand before I could even blink. He did not know I was well motivated and trying to impress a certain cute flute player.
So I pointed the gun and prepared to say my line. In theory Chuck Norris was going to... with a swift spinning turn and kick, knock the gun away then follow-up by grabbing me and taking control. I was supposed to say "BANG" when I saw him move. But by then he said it would be too late as I would no longer have the gun.
I uttered my line ...." stick 'em up", and the six time world champion quickly spun around in a blur and hit my wrist with his foot. But I held on to the gun by some quirk of fate. As the room settled and Chuck stopped moving I said in a loud slow voice
" B A N G "
The room fell apart and even Chuck had to laugh. He then went on to explain that was why you should "NEVER try this yourself".
So I had beaten the best. A man who was 65-6 life time. Arguably the best in the world. I had beaten CHUCK NORRIS. ( did I make him 65 -7 ?)
BTW , Chuck is an outspoken Christan and has written several great books. Such as "The Justice Riders", "Against All Odds" and "The Secret of Inner Strength".
You should read one sometime.
And yes. If the roads are ok I will be at the rally.