The Wisdom of Red Green
- "If it ain't broke, fix it 'til it is!"
- "If it ain't broke, you're not trying!"
- "If it ain't broke, too bad, don't total it!"
- "If the women don't find you handsome, they should at least find you handy." (Said upon the conclusion of the "Handyman's Corner" segment on The Red Green Show)
- "The Handyman's Secret Weapon." (Refers to Duct Tape.)
- Quando Omni Flunkus Moritiati-A Latin phrase which means "If all else fails, play dead." Red and the others at Possum Lodge would state this pledge before a lodge meeting after doing an arm movement across their chests.